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I managed to watch the European Champions League Football Cup final between AC Milan and Liverpool last night as it was on terrestrial TV albeit at 3:30 in the morning. I woke up at 3:15 and watched the first 45 minutes. With Liverpool down 3-0 and a full day ahead of me at work I decided, like the true Liverpool fan I am, to go back to bed and comiserate. I therefore missed the 3 goal comeback and penalty shootout victory although I recorded it and watched the first 100 minutes or so before the DVD decided to cut out.

When I was living in Germany in 2001 I managed to watch the UEFA Cup Final between Liverpool and CD Alaves which Liverpool won 5-4. This is the second division European cup behind the Champions Leeague. Like the true Liverpool fan I am, I only found out that Liverpool were playing in the final on the day itself literally five hours before kick off and from the local British army radio station stationed in Osnabruck. The final was being held in Dortmund which was a 20 minute train journey away. Like the true Liverpool fan I am, I rushed off down to the city to see if I could get tickets. I stood in a queue in pouring rain for an hour and a half for tickets, met some Liverpool fans and proceeded to get rip roaringly drunk in the temporary street market bars the city had cunningly decided to erect.

I don`t remember much of the match itself due to alcohol related memory loss but one feature before it stands out. In a bid to expel from my bladder the litres of lager I had consumed, I went to the toilets in the stadium. They were packed with Liverpool supporters with the same goal in mind. With no space at the urinals or in the cubicles they had proceeded to use the sinks as toilets. I was waiting for a space at the urinal when a large fan next to me said “Use the sink!” This wasn`t so much an idea proposal as in, “Why don`t you use the sink?” but a command whose refusal would be punished with instant death. “Use the sink” he commanded and I did. Liverpool may be a great football team but the fans scare the shit out of me.